Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
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