exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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