sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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