I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize