What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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