she peed on how many people?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
