i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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