im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize