How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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