playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
