just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
