Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
