Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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