So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Randomize