Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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