Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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