the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I think your dad took our porno
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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