you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
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