well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
