my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
third nipple confirmed
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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