p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
