Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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