I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
