remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
