will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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