wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
