does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize