? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
