Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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