My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
