hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize