I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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