so let's talk penis.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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