Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
