Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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