so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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