VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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