I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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