All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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