I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
