sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I think i got beer on your cat.
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