Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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