Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
