I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
