Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
