I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
how drunk are you?
Several
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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