i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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