i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize