it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
