Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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