So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
